going out. slacking. doing homework. straying away from homework. start worrying abt the amt of homework.
okay. maybe i should just think of those olden day women who get married at 17, turn into full-fledged aunties, have sex all the time, produce babies, stay at home and wash clothes all the time, worry abt husband while he goes out with his mistress and get tortured by mother-in-laws.
isn't that even worse? yes. definitely.
i ain't feeling good lately. and it's not boredom. it's worse than that. cos when you are bored, you can easily be entertained by a couple of spongebob videos. it's like. nth is happening nowadays so i'm starting to take notice of small little things and realize how stupid and screwed up i am. sigh.
i hope i get into team, fight in nationals, and win everything. i mean, nationals is like the closest event that i can find which is big enough to excite me.
my heart is so heavy these days it's adding on to my body weight.